i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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