i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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