My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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