singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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