it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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