Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
