Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
