i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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