Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
