I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
