absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
