You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize
