sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
