I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
