I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
