At least make sure they are 18
Why
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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