I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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