And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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