You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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