I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
whose ass print is on the piano?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
