I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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