I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Randomize
