If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
