Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
