the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
