there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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