You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize