Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
