God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
