The maid of honor just puked.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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