He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
