Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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