Whod you bang
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize