Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
last night I used snow as a chaser
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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