No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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