Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
