Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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