thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize