I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
she smelled like a LAN party
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I am naked and annoyed.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
