You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
