she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
