I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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