PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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