sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
