is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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