worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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