I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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