I'm really into asian looking animals
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
