he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize