Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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