Yo dont text me then not text me
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
